People of Faith

I used to think that being a Christian was at least partially about subscribing to a school of thought that would afford me a good bit of emotional safety. Of course I knew the main thing was to grow in my relationship with Jesus as my personal Saviour, but I also found a great deal of comfort in the idea that I was part of a larger body of assured believers who were further along in their relationship with Christ and could offer guidance and direction when I had questions. Now I take more comfort in the questions and the lack of concrete answers, than in the things the assured believers say. And as my focus has become less narrow and less about feeling safe, it has become a lot easier to see that we're all people of faith, no matter what our religion of choice happens to be. We're all in this together.

The following is from a sermon by Rabbi Eric Yoffie at the Houston Biennial Union for Reform Judaism 68th General Assembly, on November 19, 2005 in Houston, TX. It's refreshing to know that others in the faith community take issue with some of the propaganda that comes from the Christian Right. You can view the entire sermon by clicking on the link above, but this is an important excerpt:

In 1960, John F. Kennedy was attempting to become the first Catholic to be elected president of the United States. Under pressure to confront “the religious issue,” Senator Kennedy appeared before the Greater Houston Ministerial Association on September 12 to clarify his position on the relationship between religion and state. Listen well to his words:
“It is apparently necessary for me to state once again—not what kind of church I believe in, for that should be important only to me, but what kind of America I believe in. I believe in an America where the separation of church and state is absolute—where no Catholic prelate would tell the president (should he be Catholic) how to act and no Protestant minister would tell his parishioners for whom to vote—where no church or church school is granted any public funds or political preference…. I believe in an America…where there is no Catholic vote, no anti-Catholic vote, no bloc voting of any kind—and where Catholics, Protestants, and Jews, at both the lay and pastoral levels, will refrain from those attitudes of disdain and division which have so often marred their works in the past, and promote instead the American ideal of brotherhood.”

This statement was greeted by acclaim by the Protestant leadership of this city and by the religious leadership of America. And Senator Kennedy’s words remain a superb statement of how government and religion should interact in this great country. That being so, what do we have to say to our fellow Americans on the Religious Right, here and elsewhere, who challenge these principles?

...We are particularly offended by the suggestion that the opposite of the Religious Right is the voice of atheism. We are appalled when “people of faith” is used in such a way that it excludes us, as well as most Jews, Catholics, and Muslims. What could be more bigoted than to claim that you have a monopoly on God and that anyone who disagrees with you is not a person of faith?

So we ask our neighbors on the Religious Right to take note: We are religious Jews, gathered in Houston to study, pray, and commit ourselves to God. And yes, we are generally liberal in our politics. But our liberalism flows directly from our religious commitments. And we worry that you don’t understand what this means, or what it means for anyone to be a liberal religious believer.

What it means is this: that we bring a measure of humility to our religious belief. We study religious texts day and night, but we have no direct lines to heaven and we aren’t always sure that we know God’s will.

It means believing that religion involves concern for the poor and the needy, and giving a fair shake to all. When people talk about God and yet ignore justice, it just feels downright wrong to us. When they cloak themselves in religion and forget mercy, it strikes us as blasphemy.

It means that “family values” require providing health care to every child and that God cares about the 12 million children without health insurance.

It means valuing a child with diabetes over a frozen embryo in a fertility clinic, and seeing the teaching of science as a primary social good.

And it means reserving the right for each person to prayerfully make decisions for herself about when she dies.

It also means believing in legal protection for gay couples. We understand those who believe that the Bible opposes gay marriage, even though we read that text in a very different way. But we cannot understand why any two people who make a lifelong commitment to each other should be denied legal guarantees that protect them and their children and benefit the broader society. We cannot forget that when Hitler came to power in 1933, one of the first things that he did was ban gay organizations. And today, we cannot feel anything but rage when we hear about gay men and women, some on the front lines, being hounded out of our armed services. Yes, we can disagree about gay marriage. But there is no excuse for hateful rhetoric that fuels the hellfires of anti-gay bigotry.

All of these views are deeply rooted in our religious beliefs and texts. We are surprised that when it comes to the Hebrew Bible, a text we hold in common, your reading of its message is so different from ours. As for the New Testament, we claim no expertise, but our liberal Christian friends point out that there is much there that supports our approach. Jesus healed the sick, so he might have some concern for those 45 million Americans without insurance who are unable to see a doctor; he was not a hater, so would surely not join in demonizing gays; and he spoke constantly of the poor and the marginalized. In general, the Bible, both Hebrew and Christian, has far more to say about caring for the poor than about eradicating sexual sin.

In short, there are alternative ways for deeply religious people to understand the important issues of the day; we need to talk to one another about these matters; and we suggest, humbly, that there may be things that you can learn from religious liberals in these discussions.

...And while we bring no preconditions to the table, our starting point will be Senator Kennedy’s starting point forty-five years ago: that tolerance is an American value and a religious necessity; that religion is far too important to be entangled with government; that we need beware the zealots who want to make their religion the religion of everyone else; and that we all need to put our trust in America, the most religiously diverse country in the world.

Let the dialogue begin.

What Bible?

This was on the message board at jenaustin.com recently. "Just curious about what bible you read from. Romans the first chapter alone is against homosexuality. Just curious."

I'm sure this anonymous poster and I read from the same Bible. Different translations perhaps, but the text is most likely the same. It's the interpretation that's radically different. If the logic follows, then it's my interpretation that's being called into question.

Romans 1:25-27 (NIV) says:
They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator--who is forever praised. Amen. Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion.

Rev. Michael Piazza at Cathedral of Hope in Dallas has said on more than one ocassion that at the time Paul wrote this passage in Romans, temple prostitution was prevalent. What's more, cults--who used both heterosexual and homosexual sex acts--were usually the primary participants. It doesn’t take any sort of stretch of the imagination to see that there is something cockeyed about selling one’s body for personal gain, whether homosexual or heterosexual sex acts are the means used. Paul had to address this situation. But Paul is not addressing same-sex love in this passage, where two committed adults live together, love one another, and mutually contribute to a household and a family. Paul is talking about that middle-of-the-night, back-alley sort of sex act of which lust is a part, and which would still get you arrested today. To try to hastily pin this passage on those who possess a natural homosexual orientation just proves how misunderstood we gay folk continue to be.

Homosexuality is not so whimsical that it requires a bunch of lawless hooligans to suddenly become “inflamed with lust for one another” and to resolutely pursue those lusts at the expense of anything and everything that happens to be in the way. We homosexuals are far more tame and boring than that. We do not become “inflamed” any more than a heterosexual person becomes “inflamed” with heterosexuality prior to pursuing a potential mate. In fact, we may fall asleep in the middle of a heated round of Trivial Pursuit on a wild and crazy Saturday night rather than get carried away by the winds of passion, and doing so does not make us any less homosexual. Maybe that's just me. Regardless, homosexuality is not an action. It's a state of being all its own, and behavior does not decrease or increase it's existence or validity.

The subject of what is “natural” to one person over another is an interesting one. For me, it is not natural to be in a sexual relationship with a man. I have given it a half-hearted whirl, and there are no words to describe the awkwardness. My connection to men is similar to that between two heterosexual men I would imagine, in that I can talk and laugh and shoot the breeze, but the sexual attraction is entirely absent. To kiss a man is contrary to everything that I know to be true about myself and, although the act may produce a raucous and triumphant round of applause at a Focus on the Family “ex-gay” rally, it would be the ultimate self-betrayal. I choose truth over superficial and conditional acceptance by would-be peers. Christians who use this chapter of Romans to condemn homosexuality carry with them the mistaken assumption that a heterosexual orientation is the default orientation that God naturally assigns to everyone. God has other plans for about ten percent of the Realm.

Neither I nor any of the GLBT Christians I have come across in my spiritual journey have "exchanged the truth of God for a lie." It's more accurate to say we have continued to pursue truth of God despite the obstacles, and by doing so we have become better vessels through which that truth can be displayed. We have not abandoned God and God has not abandoned us. The fruit of the Spirit that continues to be produced in our lives serves as evidence. Goodness, kindness, gentleness, self-control, joy, peace, self-sacrifice, benevolence, faithfulness, and thousands of other positive qualities are present. To ignore those and focus on something that accounts for a very small percentage of the whole of the relationship speaks to a sexual fear and not to the liberating wholeness of God's love.

So who has the correct interpretation of this passage in Romans 1? Who's interpretation is incorrect? That's for you to decide. These are simply testimonies of faith that gain significance and meaning only as others relate to them and find harmony. This is the truth that I have found in God. And as I continue to grow in this relationship I'm sure God will continue to guide me, refine me, and give me greater understanding. And God will do the same for you.

So what Bible should we read? I would suggest the one that grows from words on a page, to action in our lives, to a more profound understanding of Jesus, of God, and of our faith. That's the one I want to be defined by.

Happy Thanksgiving

This has been a year of ups and downs, but one of steady growth. I have so much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving. In no particular order...

God
Peace that passes understanding
Coke Zero
Psalm 46:10 (Be still and know that I am God.)
Angela and the growth and maturity of our relationship
Pierre, Sophie, Marlee, and Harry...the pups
Wagging tails and excited doggie whines
Hope
Jesus' example of deep faith in all circumstances
Unconditional love
Jada, Ciara, and Gavin...our nieces and nephew
Family
Wisdom
Faith that overcomes
Growth
Pumpkin flavored coffee beans
The Colts are undefeated
Inspiring people who have constant joy
Ability
Blogs and the people who take the time to read them
Skim milk
Neosporin
People who use their lives for positive purposes
Imperfections
Increasing understanding
Opportunity
Commander in Chief
NFL Sunday Ticket
Second chances
Health
Silly people who make me laugh
Barbecue sauce
Blue sky
Good friends
Life!

I hope you have a fantastic holiday. Thanks for sharing this space with me.

Evangelism Moment

My friend Scot Pankey at Cathedral of Hope just started a new section in the weekly bulletin at Cathedral of Hope called Evangelism Moment, and he asked me to write something this week. It's a way for Cathedral of Hope members to share what attracted us to the church in the first place and what keeps us coming back. The only problem is, I could only write around a hundred words, and as you know I can be a bit verbose at times. This was printed in yesterday's Weekly.

Angela and I attended quite a few accepting churches in Austin with mediocre results, but after we moved to Dallas and began attending Cathedral of Hope, we knew it was the payoff we had been waiting for. No other environment had ever produced such a feeling of wholeness.

As we absorbed the atmosphere that first Sunday in 2002, the homophobia that seems to plague Christianity began to seem more and more absurd. We were just a group of Christians worshipping God with energy and conviction.

Still, many fundamentalist Christians would condemn us on the spot because we're predominantly gay. I find it odd that while our focus as GLBT Christians is God, their focus remains on our homosexuality. I largely prefer the fixation on God.

The atmosphere inside Cathedral of Hope is always one of hope, joy, and togetherness. Nothing that happens outside our walls does anything to detract from the magnitude of it and it does nothing to minimize God's ability to work in our midst. There is a great deal of comfort in that. The physical building where this happens isn't really what matters. The point is to find a spot where we're comfortable and then focus on that concentration of God.

To The Contrary on PBS

We programmed our Tivo to record shows with the words "gay" and "lesbian" in the title or synopsis, so not only are we getting everything that Marcia Gay Harden and Lisa Gay Hamilton have ever done, but we're also getting shows like To the Contrary on PBS, that we never would have known about otherwise. To The Contrary recently included lesbian ministries in their round table discussion, with a particular focus on the rise of women in the Metropolitan Community Church, or MCC.

MCC's ordained pastors are primarily female, and many of those women are lesbians. No show on gay Christians is complete without the mention of Leviticus 18:22, and To The Contrary included that near the beginning. (Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman; that is detestable.) Like clockwork a representative from some sort of family values council said, "the Bible clearly states that homosexuality is an abomination," and went on to say that homosexuality is not an intended form of natural sexual expression. It always strikes me as odd to hear someone who is heterosexual by nature, say that homosexuality is not natural. How does he know? Words hold far greater impact when they come from experience and not simply from untested beliefs. And the fact that varied interpretations exist, proves that the Bible does not "clearly state" much of anything. If the Bible was simply a set of black and white rules, there would be very little reason to pursue a greater depth of faith.

The most poignant statement in this special was meant to explain just how welcoming MCC can be, but I think it speaks volumes about God as well. Rev. Elder Darlene Garner of MCC, was talking about the frequency with which we Christians are asked to fit into a category and become defined by a familiar profile in order to be considered acceptable in many conservative traditions, but at MCC she said, "One just needs to be present in order to be acceptable." That statement is highly empowering and comforting. It has been my experience that God requires the same of us. God will work to teach and refine us as GLBT Christians, but God doesn't work to change us.

In a panel discussion, one Biblical scholar suggested that women and homosexuals have always been present and vital to church history, but the way that history has been written and passed on has failed to include the extent and impact. Something tells me that if the Bible were written today, the testimonies of faith by GLBT Christians would also be excluded because more powerful conservative groups would fight to keep them out. I think the Bible tells the truth and that God speaks through it, but I don't think it tells the whole story. That's precisely why it's so important to allow ourselves to be vessels and to allow God to speak through us today. We may not be the perfect filters, but we can be the truth. We in combination with God's other vessels will tell the whole story.

Earlier in the show Rev. Nancy Wilson said you can certainly find more justification for slavery in the Bible than you can for excluding homosexuals. No mainstream Christian church follows the laws of Leviticus. "What they do," she said, "is pick and choose and follow those laws which support their prejudices." Precisely. Only they don't think of it as using the Bible to support a prejudice. They have adopted the attitude that it is simply their duty to defend God's territory, and since homosexuality is considered to be an infringement they must do whatever they can to stop the invasion. Discrimination is an obvious by-product. To The Contrary concluded with this fitting statement that counters this type of attitude, whether it is aimed at homosexuals, women, or a number of other groups who have been denied power and rights in the past. Panelist Kim Gandy said, "People are called to the ministry by God, and God doesn't discriminate." Exactly. It's a matter of faith between the believer and God. God will lead if we will follow. It's nice to find shows that give that sentiment a voice.

20Something 11-16-05

Tonight's lesson has been posted here:

http://coh20something.blogspot.com

After tonight, 20Something is on hiatus until January. Next week it's Thanksgiving, and after that Cathedral of Hope has some special event planned on Wednesdays at 6:00 and classes will be cancelled. We will start up again the first week of January! Blessings until then...

Protecting God?

My friend, Rev. Will Rice has posted a great sermon that you can view by clicking on the link above (Protecting God? Sermon 10).

In the sermon he articulates something that I think very few Christians consciously think about, but which can be vitally important to our walk with God, and that is the idea that it's okay to be reckless with God's grace. Will says, "What I believe will really upset God is if the Gospel sits idle, protected by physical and mental barriers that keep it safe. I think we misjudge God when we think that we will be condemned for not defending God’s holiness." Well said.

Do the fundamentalists really think God will be proud of them for being stingy with Christian territory and for defending it to the point where others in God's realm begin to feel left out and condemned? That seems like grace abuse to me. God's grace has been offered freely to all, yet it often has trouble reaching all when it comes from the direction of the Christian Right. Even though many churches say, "Come as you are," some Christians still expect us to change first. It's good to know that God's grace is bigger than that, and available to us no matter where we are in life, and no matter what the grace-filterers may say about it. This is a great reminder to me that it's far more important to be a good vessel than it is to be a good filter.

Like Will, I don't believe God is going to get mad at us for being too reckless with grace, or for accepting it wholeheartedly when it is offered. But God might be upset if we aren't reckless enough. When Jesus told us to go out and make disciples of all nations and spread grace radically throughout the world, I don't think he meant that the gay ones or any of the other "different" ones should be excluded. God is inclusive, and we should be as well.

One of my favorite verses in the Bible is 1 Thessalonians 5:11. It says, "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." Grace is present in this process. Grace leaves us feeling whole, validated, and loved almost beyond comprehension, and it reminds us who and Whose we are. Even though it may feel as if we are surrounded by judgment and hostility at times, we are also surrounded by instruments of grace who will offer us hope and encouragement when we need it most. I'm grateful for Christians like Will, who offer it repeatedly, just as God instructed.

Pat Robertson's latest edict

Pat Robertson recently told residents of a town in Pennsylvania that by democratically voting their school board out of office, they had rejected God. He also warned them not to be surprised if disaster struck as punishment for their actions. It appears that Pat Robertson trusts no one's judgment but his own.

Here is a link to the article: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9995578/

It's no wonder I used to carry with me the assumption that God would strike me down with breast cancer the moment I came out as a lesbian. I subscribed to the fundamentalist idea that homosexuality was an abomination, and that the acceptance of mine would just be begging for the wrath of God to be unleashed in my life. Of course breast cancer is not a product of God's wrath, but irrational fears like that kept me closeted for quite some time. Even after I came out and discovered that God wished me no harm and would sooner unleash profoundly good things in my life than bad, I still allowed irrational fears to keep me from growing closer to God.

It's a fundamentalist tendency to paint a picture of God as a hater of all the things that the fundamentalists also happen to dislike (or fear) , and I got a good dose of that growing up. I used to think of God in the terms with which they defined God, and that left me with a definition which was not based upon faith and experience, but upon the teaching of preconceived ideas instead. As I have grown older and my experience with God has become increasingly profound and compelling, definitions rooted in legalism don't really apply anymore. It's not that I am right and they are wrong. It's just that my experience of God is different from their experience. It's faith that allows me to be secure in that. And it's wisdom that tells me if God wants to reveal another side to me, I will get the message in time.

Conservative extremists like Pat Robertson become dangerous when they present their ideas as the only possible Christian viewpoint. They thrive on judgment, fear, and perceived control, and they deem themselves successful when their targets feel sufficiently judged and fearful. The control that these conservative extremists appear to have over Christian thought is simply a misguided perception. They have faith yes, but it is not a faith that every other Christian must agree with or subscribe to in order to be right with God.

I used to put a lot of stake in what religious figures like Pat Robertson said about our society, but now the more I hear them talk, the less relevant they become.

20Something 11-9-05

Here's the link to last night's 20Something lesson on the 5th Beatitude.

http://coh20something.blogspot.com

Proposition 2: We will not be defined by it

I've heard several friends use words "gloomy" and "dark" today; the day after Texas voters approved Proposition 2. This constitutional amendment not only bans gay marriage, but also the legal recognition of civil unions as well as any other emotional affiliation that could closely resemble marriage. It’s thorough. So thorough and invasive in fact, that future generations who are more keenly aware of what it means to embrace rather than discriminate, will no doubt repeal it. It is a dark day. But it will not define us.

At the time the election results began scrolling across the bottom of the television screen and we learned the gay marriage ban had passed, Angela and I happened to be watching Commander in Chief, with Geena Davis acting as the first female President of the United States. The show is deliciously futuristic not with spaceships and cars that fly, but with revolutionary politics and progressive ideas about what to do with power. Some say we’ll never have a female president. I say it’s possible, and where there is possibility there is hope. There’s nothing wrong with having a male president of course, but I’m a big fan of breakthrough ideas and never-been-done-before scenarios. We may not see a female president in our lifetime. And we may not see a gay rights overhaul in our lifetime. But it is possible. And where there is possibility there is hope.

As we were watching the Commander in Chief and the election results began to scroll across the bottom of the screen, it became impossible not to notice the stark contrast. Even though the show is fiction, the idea that a woman can be president is empowering and brings with it the realization that the status quo will not remain forever. The decisions that this fictional president makes seem to be based not upon money, power, and influence, but upon truth and heart. That’s refreshing. But the moment we were jerked back to reality by the election results, we were reminded that truth and heart don’t always win out, and that money, power, and influence often dictate our freedoms; or the lack thereof. In the United States currently, the ones who think they have life, love, and God all figured out also have the greatest span of political influence. This leaves the rest of us who disagree in the margins and with the minority voice, but it does not mean we cannot continue to be empowered. The power must come from within.

Laws that enshrine discrimination into historical documents are always disheartening, but we don’t have to become emotionally defined by them. After learning that Texas would be one of many states to impose a constitutional ban on gay marriage, it was my first reaction to internalize the judgment and discrimination, and feel like I was a lesser citizen than my hetersexual counterparts and that my relationship was somehow less important. I felt like I lost something in the election. So I asked Angela, “Do you love me any less?” She said no.

There is power in that. Of course it doesn’t change the fact that we will not be able to legally marry in Texas until some time after the amendment is repealed and the ban is lifted. Are we and all other committed homosexual couples deserving of equal rights? Absolutely. But we shouldn’t feel like our lives are less significant if we don’t have them. The glass of wine on a nice, quiet evening at home still tastes good, God continues to bless us, and the love we share continues to grow as time passes and as we grow closer to God. No one can touch our love or our faith. That’s really what it boils down to. Do we have enough faith to allow ourselves to seek God and have constant peace, no matter what the circumstances?

I’m not suggesting that we shouldn’t be angry about the outcome of elections that attempt to protect and defend “family values” and keep those of us who are arbitrarily deemed “family value-less” contained. But we don’t have to allow external judgment to cause us to judge ourselves. We all know we possess family values. We just don’t look like the Norman Rockwell images of family that the Christian Right tries to perpetuate. Frankly, those types of images are utopian and unrealistic. Yet it seems that Christians are supposed to believe that those who possess true “family values” will happily subscribe to the idea that this type of “golly gee” setting exists, and that it is something both desirable and attainable. Same gender couples can create healthy family environments just as easily as heterosexual couples can, regardless of the rights we are afforded (or denied for that matter). And as we continue to create these types of environments despite the obstacles, we will become increasingly identified by the positive effects of our love—our children, our homes, our pets, our joy—and not simply by whatever misunderstood sexual images may have attached themselves to us. Discriminatory sentiments do not last forever. As Bishop John Shelby Spong said, they eventually die of their own irrelevency.

Marriage is a Christian celebration which spiritually joins two people and their lives. More importantly, a marriage ceremony allows these two people to stand on holy ground before God, and to vow to love and honor one another during every moment of each day. We can stand on this holy ground and recite vows to one another without the legal document that would grant us the ensuing civil rights. Would our lives be enhanced by these rights? Yes. Do they make our commitment before God any less valid? No. God is bigger than courthouse documents.

Angela and I made our vows, exchanged rings, and became wed at Cathedral of Hope in Dallas, Texas, and by doing so we entered into a covenant relationship with God. Having a covenant relationship is what’s important. A covenant is an agreement that becomes binding on all parties, and a promise that deepens the significance of the relationship and makes it more valuable than all the other relationships in your life. We cannot take a covenant relationship lightly. God does not take my covenant relationship with Angela lightly. God continues to demand excellence of us—trust, honor, courage, truth, servitude, respect, and love—and we try our best to respond with just that, individually and as a couple. It’s a human thing to cheapen a relationship because it is homosexual. Texas is now among the states who have attempted to cheapen thousands of healthy relationships, but it won't succeed.

There is so much to say on this subject. But for now, I'm going to take it to God in prayer and do my best to grow closer to God each day despite the outside attempts to create distance between my Creator and me. Conservatives who supported the gay marriage ban can claim victory in God's name all they want, and it will not change my relationship with God or my belief God loves me exactly as I am and wishes no harm, judgment, or discrimination. I'm frustrated with the outcome of yesterday's vote, but I'm not going to be defined by that frustration or by any deparate pleas to be accepted by the Christian Right. They are not a part of my relationship with God and they don't have the power to affect my sense of self-worth. Thank God.

Let's continue to be defined by grace, love, and goodness. Besides, God is ultimately concerned with the state of our hearts, not with the state of our filing cabinets and folders marked "legal documents." We certainly deserve equal rights. But when society fails us, God upholds us. If our hearts are one with God, a greater power defines us.

If you're in Texas...

...please vote against Proposition 2 today.

If passed, this Constitutional amendment would permanently write discrimination into a document that is supposed to protect the rights of all who are governed by it. To borrow the words of my friend Sara, "This amendment is mean-spirited and written in such a way that it could invalidate the few documents that GLBT folks can have drafted by a lawyer to protect themselves...wills, powers of attorney, medical directives. There has even been debate about whether Proposition 2, as written, would invalidate ALL marriages in the state of Texas."

We have the opportunity today to speak out against those who don't understand us and who would rather we did not exist. It may take all of us, but the truth can prevail.

No matter what, we should continue to love our partners and God with all our hearts. That's something they can't touch.

There is always hope

I wrote the following in Tuesday's blog, and I'm almost eerily haunted by it now:

"No matter how dire the circumstances or how badly we are mistreated, our lives have significance. It depends not upon the circumstances themselves or the people who seem to have power over us, but rather the very fact that we exist. No matter how lonely and rejected we may feel at times, there is always someone out there who will come to our rescue the minute they become aware of our need. There is always hope."

I usually write with as many details as possible, but this time it's not possible so I hope you'll bear with me. The specifics aren't as important as the overall message anyway.

On Wednesday morning I got some surprising news that a change was coming in my life, significant enough to alter my ability to focus on the book I'm working on now, my ability to co-lead 20Something, and even my ability to post blogs to this space regularly. Even though I felt stressed and a bit ill at first, I came to grips with it over the next couple of days. I began to feel a renewed determination to find a way to make it all work, and even a more accute awareness of the peace of God that is present in my life no matter what the circumstances.

There was a new development today that is a complete injustice and further complicates the situation, but as I step back and look at it objectively I think this may the thing that has given way to complete brokenness. By that I mean the circumstance has reached it's bottom point, and now real change and healing can begin.

This whole experience has allowed me to fully experience the idea that I wrote about on Tuesday, and that is, "there is always someone out there who will come to our rescue the minute they become aware of our need." This person is the whole reason why I began writing this blog today. I wish I could name him. But God knows him well and that's really what matters. This person is the most fair-minded individual I have ever met. There is no gay, straight, black, or white in his eyes. He listens before he speaks, he considers others' feelings before his own, and his loyalty comes with an unwavering steadiness that grows each time it is tested. He has been directly responsible for an incredible amount of goodness and success recently, yet he takes none of the credit. He is an inspiration to me. And he has come to my rescue this week.

These people are in our lives for a reason. They are tiny little reflections of God, reminding us that there is a greater power at work and that we are loved more than we could ever imagine. It's not hard to see. When the tunnel seems dark, the flashes of light are easy to recognize. I feel blessed to be able to experience the truth that we are never alone, and that no cirumstance is so dire that injustices will be allowed to have free reign over us. There is always a way out.

The effects of what happened this week remain to be seen, but with this angel involved and through the power of prayer, I know that everything is going to be okay. For that I am deeply grateful.

20Something 11-2-05

Last night's 20Something study on the 4th Beatitude is posted here. If it's not on the front page check the November archives.

http://coh20something.blogspot.com

Hunger and thirst for righteousness...

I can learn a lot from a dog

We recently adopted a two year-old miniature schnauzer from a Dallas area rescue group. When he first came to us he was happy overall, but had some lingering effects from bad things he had experienced in the past. He was dropped off at the Humane Society at the beginning of August with a broken leg and his owners couldn't pay for treatment. Thankfully he was picked up and fostered for several weeks by the rescue group. His foster mom said there was evidence that he had never been house-broken, and she thinks he spent much of the first two years of his life in a crate. Not a great life for a playful pup. But his broken leg has healed, he has learned the art of going outside, and he is in a home that loves him. His name was Lil Bit when he came to us--his size demanded it--and we added Harry, so he became Lil Bit Harry. We call him Harry.

I doubt that Harry spent much time in prayer while he was in confined to a kennel, but then again perhaps he did. I've never been inside a dog's mind and I don't know exactly what goes on in there. But his literal and figurative brokenness says something about the way God works in our lives, and in all of creation. No matter how dire the circumstances or how badly we are mistreated, our lives have significance. It depends not upon the circumstances themselves or the people who seem to have power over us, but rather the very fact that we exist. No matter how lonely and rejected we may feel at times, there is always someone out there who will come to our rescue the minute they become aware of our need. There is always hope.

Although I often fail, I make an effort to actively sense God's presence every day through people, through nature, through animals, etc., and I'm always awed by the beauty. Some days it takes longer than others to filter out the human impurities, but God is life and it's profound to realize that something of this power and magnitude continues to course through the world despite our carelessness. In Harry's case, it's good to know carelessness and neglect don't haunt us forever.

We have three other dogs, so Harry has been learning the eat-outside-play-sleep routine from them. He likes to be where they are. But some mornings, while everyone else is asleep, he jumps off the bed and prances out to meet me at the coffee pot just to stretch his little paws on my legs and say good morning. He wags his tail so hard his whole body wiggles. I want to be that excited about life and second chances. God has healed me from one bout with brokenness after another, and it's just plain silly not to be more ready with my gratitude. Keeping it hidden or thinking, "Yes I'm thankful, but..." right before I rattle off a laundry list of reasons why I should still be unhappy is a waste of time and energy.

Gratitude is something that we have the power to emit no matter what the circumstances--no matter what family member has just rejected us, no matter what evangelical pastor has just condemned us from the pulpit, etc. And gratitude can not only help bring about a change in our circumstances, but it can also change us in the process. This is something we already know, but it's nice to be reminded. Thanks Harry.